The Elizabethan Insult

The Elizabethan Insult

and

Curses of an Elizabethan Nature
or, How to Cuss Like an Elizabethan Sailor

The "Shakespearean" Insult Generator | How to Swear Like An Elizabethan

Elizabethan English is a wonderfully colorful language full of numerous evocative words and phrases. Elizabethans took a delight with language and it is fitting, then, that this would filter into the art of mudslinging. Thier mastery of language was often showcased in the clever weaving together of terms to form stinging phrases of wit. Remember this was a time when the average person did not read, and other forms of entertainment were not readily available, but good conversation acted as a substitute.

Some Forms of Address NOT Used In Polite Conversation:

Sirrah. Contrary to popular belief this word does not substitute for "sir". Remember that this word is considered an insult and only used to redress bad children, lazy servants, or downright rogues. E.g. "Sirrah, by my maidenhead I do not believe a single word that you have professed to be true. You are a rogue and scoundrel. Be gone from my sight."

Fellow. This may seem an innocuous form of address and one might usually discount it as nothing more than an every day expression, but do not be fooled. The Elizabethan Male more often than not would have felt insulted by this form of address considering it patronizing, or in some cases a very common term akin to "dude" and/or "pal".

The "Shakespearean" Insult Generator

"Do you bite your thumb at me, sir?"

Many people have seen this in some shape or form or another. This is a useful tool for a variety of insults, and provides you with jibes much more interesting than *insert idiotic sneer here* "You're an idiot/jerk/dork." In forming the insult one can be creative to the point that the person being insulted won't even realize it until much later.

In order to use this insult generator choose one word from each column and combine them using "Thou art a(n)..."

"Thou art a churlish, dismal-dreaming fustilarian."

If you wish to make a longer, more interesting insult you could choose more than one word from columns one and two and combine them.

"Thou art an artless, crook-pated, fawning, mewling, elf-skinned puttock."

Feel free to add your own adjectives to the list as you get more comfortable with the process.

Column 1	Column 2	Column 3
Artless	Base-court	Apple-john
Bawdy	Bat-fowling	Baggage
Beslubbering	Beef-witted	Barnacle
Bootless	Beetle-headed	Bladder
Churlish	Boil-brained	Boar-pig
Cockered	Clapper-clawed	Bugbear
Clouted	Clay-brained	Bum-bailey
Craven	Common-kissing	Canker-blossom
Currish	Crook-pated	Clack-dish
Dankish	Dismal-dreaming	Clot-pole
Dissembling	Dizzy-eyed	Coxcomb
Droning	Dog-hearted	Codpiece
Errant	Dread-bolted	Death-token
Fawning	Earth-vexing	Dewberry
Fobbing	Elf-skinned	Flap-dragon
Froward	Fat-kidneyed	Flax-wench
Frothy	Fen-sucked	Flirt-gill
Gleeking	Flap-mouthed	Foot-licker
Goatish	Fly-bitten	Fustilarian
Gorbellied	Folly-fallen	Giglet
Impertinent	Fool-born	Gudgeon
Infectious	Full-gorged	Haggard
Jarring	Guts-griping	Harpy
Loggerheaded	Half-faced	Hedge-pig
Lumpish	Hasty-witted	Horn-beast
Mammering	Hedge-born	Huggermugger
Mangled	Hell-hated	Jolt-head
Mewling	Idle-headed	Lewdster
Paunchy	Ill-breeding	Lout
Pribbling	Ill-nurtured	Maggot-pie
Puking	Knotty-pated	Malt-worm
Puny	Milk-livered	Mammet
Quailing	Motley-minded	Measle
Rank	Onion-eyed	Minnow
Reeky	Plume-plucked	Miscreant
Roguish	Pottle-deep	Mold-warp
Ruttish	Pox-marked	Mumble-news
Saucy	Reeling-ripe	Nut-hook
Spleeny	Rough-hewn	Pigeon-egg
Spongy	Rude-growing	Pignut
Surly	Rump-fed	Puttock
Tottering	Shard-borne	Pumpion
Unmuzzled	Sheep-biting	Rats-bane
Vain	Spur-galled	Scut
Venomed	Swag-bellied	Skains-mate
Villainous	Tardy-gaited	Strumpet
Warped	Tickle-brained	Varlot
Wayward	Toad-spotted	Vassal
Weedy	Unchin-snouted	Whey-face
Yeasty	Weather-bitten	Wagtail

How to Swear Like an Elizabethan
Or, I Said What !?!?!

Romeo: Lady, by yonder blessed moon I vow
That tips with silver all these fruit tree tops

Juliet: Oh, swear not by the moon, th´inconstant moon.
That monthly changes in her circled orb
Lest that thy love prove likewise variable.

Romeo: What shall I swear by?

Juliet: Do not swear at all.
Or, if thou wilt, swear by thy gracious self.
Which is the god of my idolatry.
An I´ll believe thee.

Romeo: If my heart´s dear love ---

Juliet: Well, do not swear. Although I joy in thee
I have no joy of this contract tonight.

Often, to lend credence to your words, or indicate the voracity of your words one might swear by any number of things:

One might swear by God's name, but more often than not they would swear by

"God's Teeth" - "God's teeth, 'tis cold outside."
God's Wounds as "Zounds" (pronounced: zoonds) - "Zounds, I ne'er thought she wouldst do that!"
"God's Blood"

Some men might swear by mythological and classical beings (possibly to sound more educated?)

"by the Might of Mars!"
"the Beauty of Venus!"

Men swore by numerous other things:

"...by my beard."
By the saints
By tools of their trade:

"By my hammer and tongs" in the case of a blacksmith
"By my sword..." as a knight

A woman wouldn't be so crass as to swear by false deities, etc… She would choose more polite phrasings:

"On my honor/chastity/virtue..."
A woman might also swear by the saints.
Swear by the tools of her trade: spinning wheel, thread and needles, etc.

Some words of exclamation that might be considered Elizabethan expletives:

"Fie!" is used a general exclamation of disgust.

An example of Shakespeare's use of the word:

Fie, fie! unknit that threatening unkind brow,
And dart not scornful glances from those eyes,

Some common phrases using "Fie!"

"Oh, Fie!"
"Fie and fie again!"
"Fie upon it!" or "Fie upon that!" or "Fie upon you!"

"Tush!" is a more mild exclamation than "fie". The word is used alone in a sentence (for instance you would not say "Tush upon you!" It sounds silly). It's hard to equate this to a term in the modern lexicon as it is similar to some, yet synonymous with none.

An example of the word's use in a sentence:

Oh tush, sir… you gave me a fright you did…

"Go to!" is an exclamation akin to our modern "Get outta here!" and/or "Really?" It is also used to tell a person to take their leave.

An example of the use of "Go to!" in a sentence:

Go to, you're a dry fool; I'll no more of you:
besides, you grow dishonest.